Breaking Down Bauer: Tackling the New Season of 24
Written by: Rob Van Winkle, CC2K Staff Writer
3-06-07
Let me begin with a sincere apology for not updating this piece for over a week, and altogether skipping an entire episode. I TRIED to write something about LAST week’s 24, but my notes read like this:
9:15 – God DAMN this is boring.
9:30 – I wonder if I should grow a beard more like Jack Bauer at the start of this season, or former President Logan at this point in the season?
9:45 – zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
That’s right; last week was so dull, that I FELL ASLEEP, with my finger on the “z” button of my keyboard. (I must have been getting ready to write either “zero” or “zounds!” or something.
I can’t tell you WHY I disliked last week’s installment so much. I mean, with (PRETTY DATED SPOILER ALERT) Charles Logan returning to action, and the plot to assassinate President Wayne Palmer in full effect, it SHOULD have been exciting. However, two things struck me:
- Logan was interesting BECAUSE he was so inept – Charles Logan was a bumbler two seasons ago when he became the acting president, and what made him such a compelling character last year was that you truly felt that he was unable to do his job, and thus capable of screwing up in monumental ways. This fact even ameliorated somewhat his culpability in last season’s crime; someone that out of his depth JUST MIGHT conspire with terrorists and think it was in the best interest of his country. However, to have him show up this year calm, controlled, contrite, and confident (the alliteration wasn’t intentional; I just couldn’t stop it once it got started!) makes him just another aide, and thus boring. I have not cared for a single second that he was on screen.
- Wayne Palmer does not have the charisma of David Palmer, who never had any charisma himself – I LIKE Dennis Haysbert, but he always seemed to me to be the Gheorge Muresan of Hollywood: ultimately too tall for his own body, and thus never quite agile enough to pull it off. THIS guy actually falls short of THAT. (It doesn’t help that his dialogue is both ham-fisted AND clichéd). The entire time his staffers were plotting his death, I couldn’t figure out why he’d inspire ANY kind of emotion in them, and even after the explosion, it still felt like a minor deal.
At any rate, all that leads us to this week’s installment, which might…MIGHT…be the least believable episode since Jack and CTU tracked down a streaking missile via computer, then coordinated a counter-strike that destroyed it seconds before it landed in LA.
SPOILER ALERT
The assassination attempt has led to the death of terrorist-turned-U.S.-collaborator Hamri Al-Assad, and has critically wounded Wayne Palmer. Because of this, the creepy vice-president (and his too-sexy-by-half assistant) now assumes command in Washington, D.C. This man was in support of the Muslim internment program that the president’s chief advisor proposed earlier in the DAY, and has decided to use his new-found authority to institute them. In FACT, he makes the decision to COVER UP the fact that Al-Assad was NOT behind the assassination attempt (a piece of misinformation that has leaked, and has not been corrected) as JUSTIFICATION for this move. Chief Advisor Peter MacNicol has to either lie about Al-Assad’s involvement in the attack to get his measures enacted, or get implicated himself in the attack. My question: What?
Meanwhile, Jack Bauer accompanies Charles Logan to the Russian Consulate in Los Angeles (Ignorant question: are there really foreign consulates from every country in the world in Los Angeles? I thought these were in Washington, D.C. What gives here…?). There Logan asks the consul about the evil Russian General Gredenko’s whereabouts, even threatens the consul with some damaging information, but ultimately gets nowhere. As Bauer and Logan leave, Logan states that he is convinced that the consul was lying about not knowing where Gredenko was, and that he (Logan) KNEW he was lying because “as someone who has done a lot of lying myself, I know what the signs are.” At this word, Jack BREAKS INTO THE RUSSIAN CONSULATE, and BEATS AND TORTURES the Consul for the information he seeks. He gets it, but before he can call CTU, Russian agents break into the office and take Jack prisoner.
Okay, let me lay down some groundwork for how utterly absurd this is:
- Two seasons ago, Jack led a raid into the Chinese consulate, a mission that cost a Chinese man his life. Call this four years before Jack raids the Russian Consulate (or 4 BJRRC)
- As a direct result of this mission, a bounty was put on Jack, and he was forced to fake his own death and leave the country under an assumed name, abandoning everyone he knew and loved. (4 BJRRC)
- Eventually, circumstances forced him back “from the dead.” Soon after that, he was kidnapped, shipped to a Chinese prison, and tortured for nearly two years non-stop, reducing him to a shell of the man and agent he once was. (2 BJRRC)
- He was returned to the U.S. on a diplomatic deal, brokered because a Muslim terrorist agreed to give CTU crucial information in exchange for having the privilege of torturing and killing Jack Bauer himself. When informed of this deal, Jack is happy to do it, so after all the brutal treatment he has suffered, he will at least have the chance to die for something. (Approximately 12 HOURS BJRRC)
- Jack, having escaped that situation, finds himself attempting to extract information from a man, while in the presence of Hamri Al-Assad. He can not do so, and insists that the man knows nothing. Al-Assad gets the information mere minutes later, and Jack is forced to admit that not only has his ordeal made him less effective as an agent, but his ability to read his enemies has vanished as well. (Approximately 8 Hours BJRRC)
- When the nuclear bomb blows up in Los Angeles, Jack weeps like a baby, and calls CTU begging to get taken off the case, as he can not handle it anymore. He is told that he is needed, and is thus forced to stay. (Approximately 6 hours BJRRC)
That’s enough. Here’s the point, after ALL THIS, Charles Logan simply tells Jack that the Russian Consul is lying. Logan has NOTHING other than his hunch to back this up. Nonetheless, this is enough to convince Jack to essentially START THIS WHOLE CHAIN UP AGAIN! A consulate is essentially foreign soil; US laws do NOT hold precedent there. Jack has literally NO RIGHT to do what he did, and if caught, the Russians can do WHATEVER THEY WANT to him. Are we saying that a man who was COMPLETELY BROKEN – as recently as earlier that very day – would be able to commit the same act that got him that way a scant few hours after finally being liberated? And he’d do so solely on the word of a man he neither likes nor trusts? REALLY?
I guess so. Jack does all this, and he gets caught. Like the true hero he is, his only concern is that the information he has once again sacrificed his life to get makes its way to CTU, and he convinces a Russian agent to make the call. However, right as he’s about to talk to Bill Buchanan (Actual phone call: “Hello, this is CTU.” “I need to speak to Bill Buchanan.” “He’s busy.” “This is urgent.” “Okay. Hold on.” Who knew it was that easy to get through to the top man at a top secret government organization?) he’s shot by a mysterious man, whose face is obscured right until the end. As the clock winds down to zero…we are finally able to see the man who has killed the Russian agent, and Jack’s plans to boot. That man was…a complete nobody. Nice twist, 24! Can’t WAIT to see what in story next week!